Exercise - The One Thing Keeping Me Sane
As I walked into radiation yesterday, I was riding a nice endorphin high. I had just finished my 6:45-7:45am Crossfit-adjacent workout class (I've starting going to the later class because I can simply go to radiation straight away at 7:45) and, while sweaty, showed up to 'torch the cancer'. It was an excellent workout and I am actually performing at 85-90% these days. I'm rowing at almost pre-chemo effort, and I only had to pause twice today to let my heart rate come down. Feels so good. The weights might not be as heavy yet but that will come. Jumping is still out (due to my chest port); it just makes me cringe when the port moves in my chest and I definitely get 'weak ass'. But I can still bust out a pretty good workout.
While I mention the workouts throughout my posts (including massive walking in Carmel), it hasn't taken center stage in my writing as it maybe should. It's the one thing I promised myself back in August that I would do through this whole process. It's non-negotiable. Even in the final week of chemo, I showed up, did what I could, sometimes cried on the way home, but I accomplished what I set out to do. And accomplishing that goal is something I am immensely proud of. Cancer has taken a bit from me and it wasn't going to take that.
Some of the people at my 5:30/6:45 workout know what's up with me. The trainers do. And they have been super supportive and kind. I miss the 5:30am crew now that I'm at the 6:45am class, but that's what I need to do right now. I miss my Maine Beach Bootcamp crew a ton; but 6:15am in the cold would have probably killed me and I had (and now have daily) treatments that got (and continue to get) in the way. My hope is, after radiation, I can show up to Beach Bootcamp in great shape and just hop back in like I never left.
So yes, I show up to radiation smelly and sweaty 4 out of 5 days, but so what? The nurses are all wearing masks again. It's truly one of the few things that has kept me sane through this life-altering journey. I plan to continue through the rest of it. xo J

I am so very impressed by this! You are truly inspirational. I let my workouts fall off during hard times/injuries etc and boy do I regret it. Congrats- you are immensely strong in every sense of the word!
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