The Day before Chemo Day Three

After a pretty active day/week, I've hit the wall.  I'm tired.  Cancelled a call with a new Peer Mentor (MGH found someone with my same treatment for me to talk with - I'm still in information gathering mode) tonight and will head to bed soon. It's 7:06pm.

Other than the return-to-my-teenage-years acne breakout, it's been a pretty good week.  I am still completely astounded at how much this diagnosis takes out of a day.  The pea-sized tumor doesn't correlate to the massive changes taking place in my life.  While I made it to Beach Bootcamp and coffee after this morning, I had a call with my MGH social worker (theme of the day: "schedule more 'Jennifer' things"), took Candace for a tweak (she is much more agreeable now), and would have had this call at 8:00pm, until I cancelled.

But it's not just those 2 hours spent on appointments - it's rinsing my mouth out with salt water (or baking soda + water) after I eat, picking up a prescription for the acne breakout (please let it work), washing my hair so gently as it's getting brittle, and making sure I have a protein drink (DO. NOT. LIKE. VANILLA.) around 10:30am.  Drinking massive amounts of water all. day. long.

Thus the "schedule more 'Jennifer' things" conversation with the MGH social worker.  As much as I don't want cancer to be my lifestyle (I will not show up with a pink ribbon to chemo, nor will I wear pink), it's invaded my life pretty completely.  Even a quick visit to my youngest daughter at her college on Sunday night (oh, how I missed hotel life!) meant I had to make sure I had the pharmacy with me (just in case), had the emergency phone numbers, and packed my silk pillow case (another tool to combat hair loss), protein shakes, and bottles of water.

I'll be looking for other things to do/explore over the next few months.  I renewed my membership at the MFA in Boston and should just book tickets to the current exhibit there.  I have been meaning to check out shops on Beacon Hill.  Take a day trip up to Portland from Kennebunk.  Book another overnight at a fabulous hotel.  It doesn't feel as 'natural' as it used to be to schedule these things with my priorities focused on treatment.  But now that there is a rhythm to my weeks, hopefully this will be easier. I'm taking suggestions for any distractions either in Boston or Maine. Let me know. xo J

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