12:14am and No Sleep

It’s a sad day when Ativan doesn’t come through for me. Took one at 9:00pm and was asleep by 9:30pm. Until 10:40 when my husband came up and the dog got bothered and needed more water in her bowl. Boom. Wide. Awake.

I’m not even fighting it - I overslept the past two days with a very early bedtime last night and slept most of today at chemo. And then for 3 hours when I returned home. I may as well be across the world; it’s morning to me now.

I have a busy day ahead and my nap window looks like it will be on a drive back up to Maine. I hear my husband snoring from the guest room (to where he voluntarily decamped after waking me up) so he will be good to drive.

I have always been an excellent sleeper. On planes, especially in cars, in theaters, stays at hotels - never a worry about my ability to sleep.

The steroids they use on chemo day, combined with Ativan and IV Benadryl, really can mess me up. Don’t get me wrong - I love riding the steroid high for Thursday and Friday post chemo. I get a lot of shit done. But they do interfere with sleep. Ativan has been closing that gap, until tonight.

I hope everyone else is all tucked in and sound asleep. And I hope that for me tomorrow night too. Until then, online shopping… Xo J

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